Obviously the big news of the pop culture week is Paris Hilton's upcoming penitentiary vacation for drunk driving and driving with a suspended license. She probably would have gotten off with probation but she showed up to court late and acted like her usual circus sideshow self. She is calling on her fans to fight on her behalf with emails and letters to the Governor.
My first question is, Paris has fans? Secondly, who are these people and what could they possibly be a fan of? Apparently they are gathering a petition signed by like-minded folks trying to set her free.
My proposal is this: a petition not just to keep her in jail for the full 45 day sentence but to eliminate the precautions given to her. They are planning on keeping her separated from the general population for her own safety. Well what good is that? Isn't part of the point of jail the threat that you are surrounded by criminals such as yourself?
Maybe Nicole Richie can get arrested for drunk driving again and they can record a new episode of The Simple Life. Ooh and wait a second. I have a great idea. Since Paris is such an obvious musical talent I smell a Live from Prison record. And people thought Johnny Cash's Live from Folsom Prison was a barn-burner!
3 comments:
I just love how the petition states that her contribution to society is how she brings "beauty and excitement" to our "mundane lives." Um, my life is fine without her, thanks. And last I knew beauty and excitement didn't pardon criminals.
I was also appalled by the reference to my life being "mundane." Um, isn't it mundane when you do the exact same thing every night of your life, even if it's going out partying?
Conan picked up on the absurdity of the whole situation and on Tuesday night, did exactly as I hoped he would: He had James Lipton read the petition, completely unchanged. It really illustrated how ridiculous all of this is.
Also that night, when Conan announced that Paris Hilton was going to jail, the audience burst into applause that lasted for a good 5-10 seconds.
I don't believe she has fans. I refuse to believe that.
Those are definitely the moments that make life worth living. I wholeheartedly agree that we are on the right path and hopefully someday we will be rewarded for this devotion beyond our own endless amusement.
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