Nielsen Loves Me...But Not Really

So a few weeks ago I received a call which I thought was a telemarketer, but it was not. Instead it was the people at Nielsen TV Ratings, asking how many televisions I had so they could send me TV Viewing Diaries.

So my diaries arrived last Thursday. Apparently you write down every minute the TV is on, whether anyone is watching it or not. Any persons watching must be listed, including their gender, age and hours they work a week. Of course that means just me, except for one other person (who also writes on this blog) who was a visitor one night, so she got included too.

While this is not an informative nor necessarily intelligent post for my first non-CMVofW posting in months, it's something I find amusing. I'm not sure how or why the Nielsen people picked me, but I don't think I'm helping their cause.

Here is the television I have listed as watching so far:

• The Soup (on E!)
• SpongeBob SquarePants (on Nick)
• Everybody Hates Chris (on the CW)
• My Name is Earl (on NBC)
• The Office (on NBC)
• Scrubs (on NBC)
• Grey's Anatomy (on ABC)
• Best Week Ever (on VH1)
• Sex & The City (on TBS)
• The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air (on Nick. Twice.)
• SpongeBob SquarePants (yes, again)
• The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air (okay, three times)
• Full House (on Family)
• The Philadelphia Story (on TCM)
• How I Met Your Mother (on CBS)
• 50 Greatest TV Icons (on TV Land)
• Heroes (on NBC)

If they were expecting According To Jim or Dancing With The Stars, they are sorely mistaken. Needless to say I doubt I'll skew their results, they'll probably just throw them away. It's almost encouraging me to watch weird things on TV, just so I can write it down.

There's also a small section for me to write in my "comments" on Television in general... Maybe I should just write down this blog's URL...and leave it at that.

The Triumph Return of Television

It’s been over three weeks since my last post, and even longer since my last post of substance. But hopefully soon that will all change with the return of Fall Network Programming this week!

The following are the list of shows I’m planning to watch this season…and yes, most of them are returning series. I really don’t have much faith or interest in any of the new offerings.

Mondays:

Of course I will be continuing my watching of How I Met Your Mother, which should contain more hilarious moments as the last season provided.

I will be simultaneously taping Everybody Hates Chris on the CW. I find this sitcom more “cute” than laugh-out-loud funny, and I enjoy the 80s pop culture.

Also I will be watching Heroes. I am late coming into this show, but have been able to catch up on the first season through NetFlix, and I do find this show enjoyable in that comic book way.

Tuesdays:

…will apparently be spent watching something from NetFlix, or reading.

Wednesdays:

I’ve decided to give Private Practice a try, since I am a fan of Grey’s Anatomy. I never have much faith in spinoffs, though.

A show that premiered last week I happened to catch and enjoyed is Kitchen Nightmares, featured Hell’s Kitchen's Gordon Ramsay. I just find him so ridiculously entertaining and enjoy any show where a majority of the dialogue has to be bleeped out. Like this:

Thursdays:

Grey’s Anatomy will be watched, but my expectations are low as well. They have a lot to make up for after the second half of last season.

My Name is Earl…although I love Jason Lee, I can take or leave at this point.

The Office though, of course! This is probably the “must-see” of all of my television viewing. What will it be like with Ryan being Michael’s boss? And what happened with Jim and Pam? And is Karen just still sitting in NYC somewhere? Oh Dwight, how I’ve missed you…

Scrubs will be watched as well, but that won’t be on until the month of hour-long episodes of The Office finish up. I can’t say I’m really pulling for JD and Eliot to get together, though.

Fridays & Saturdays:

These are not TV nights, my friends.

Sundays:

I guess I could lie and say I’ll still watch Desperate Housewives, but that would be embarrassing to myself and others.

So that’s it, dear neglected readers! What shows are on your schedule?

Look Out, There's a New Crowd in Town

This is the week all of us TV geeks wait for. Some of our favorite shows are wrapping up what we usually feel is a too-short season. Despair not say the networks. They have gloriously chosen this week to unveil their fall television schedules. Forget about which shows will be successful. I love trying to figure out which shows will pass my own high standards.

I make the distinction between the two because lets face it, the American people don't exactly choose the best to watch. I lose faith in any group that watches "According to Jim" enough to make it last six seasons. You read that correctly; six seasons! I give Jim Belushi all the credit in the world for Mr. Destiny but outside of that his career is one giant disaster after another. Yet here he is, still a television star after 6 years.

But I digress. Let us focus not on the disappointment of mediocre tripe but instead on the results of my own favorites from last year. Without a doubt my early favorite of this past season was "Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip", the much fabled but disappointingly rated dramedy from the brilliant Aaron Sorkin. I pretty much worship at the feet of Sorkin. I believe he is one of the greatest screenwriters in modern television history and that his ability to write realistic dialogue is unparalleled. "Sports Night" and "The West Wing" set up incredible expectations for any work that would follow. I seem to be one of the few who actually really enjoyed Studio 60. I do admit that it isn't his best work but it is still more worthy of primetime than most of the drivel out there.

The biggest surprise for me was "Friday Night Lights". I believe it to be the best new show of the last season, hands down. It fantastically painted life in small town Texas where people do obsess on football. But to dismiss it as a sports-centered show, which I think many viewers have, is wrong. It is simply a great show about people you can actually somewhat relate to. Connie Britton and Kyle Chandler play a couple in a marriage that all could hope to aspire to.

Other shows I felt worth watching were "Ugly Betty", "Brothers and Sisters", "Jericho", and "30 Rock". Ugly Betty and Brothers and Sisters aren't exactly high brow entertainment but they are good for an occasional laugh and simple fun. Jericho is probably the best serious drama of the year but I don't know if it will ever see a second. 30 Rock grew on me as the season went on. Despite Alex Baldwin's public disaster with his daughter, he has become one of the funniest men on television. I'm glad someone finally saw the potential from his many, spectacular Saturday Night Live guest spots.

Enough about the past. We should look to the future. NBC just released its schedule for this fall. Let me start by saying how nice it must be to live as a moron. Apparently anyone can run a television network. To be fair the head of NBC can't be a complete tool. I must applaud them for keeping Thursday night in tact despite lower ratings. The decision to keep "Scrubs" is definitely a huge positive. Also it appears "The Office" will be bumped up to 30 episodes, including 5 one hour shows.

Let me get back to my original point, however. Television networks seem to be run by imbeciles. While I'm very happy that Friday Night Lights was renewed, plunking it in the show destroyer time slot of 9pm on Friday nights seems idiotic at best. Then there is the constant desire from networks to take what works and beat it to death. NBC found success with "Heroes" this year. So what do they do? They usher in new dramas for next year that are all based in science fiction. My guess that maybe if they are lucky 1 will work out. When will these fools realize that formulas don't work? Just because one science fiction show works doesn't mean you should focus an entire network schedule around them.

But enough with all of the negativity. There is one new show that has really peaked my interest so far. ABC will hopefully air a new series by Mitch Hurwitz called "The Thick of It". It is a BBC adaptation starring a great cast of Michael McKean, Oliver Platt, and John Michael Higgins. Here's hoping that this adaptation leans more towards the success of The Office and less towards "Coupling".

All we can do now is sit and wait. We have to trust that the television executives will try to showcase at least a few shows geared towards intelligent viewers. 1 season of a brilliant show like "Arrested Development" is better than nothing at all. We need our next cult favorite.