After we ordered our drinks, and were perusing the menu, the sounds of Dusty Springfield lingered in the background with "You Don't Have To Say You Love Me." As we wondered where our waitress was, I heard the horrible "plinging" of a piano, and laughed as I realized it was Bette Midler's "The Rose." I commented, "What kind of radio station is this?" Was it overdramatic song radio? It's like those songs that crazy kids on American Idol like to pick to show their "talent."
The other reason I found this amusing was because of the book I've been reading, called I Hate Myself and Want to Die: The 52 Most Depressing Songs You've Ever Heard. Not only is the book enjoyable, but I tend to agree with most of its picks. And ironically, "The Rose" is one of the 52 I just recently read about (Number 16). So what should immediately follow after we order our entrees? Well Number 41, "Send In The Clowns" by Judy Collins! I think if it wasn't for the book, I'd be getting depressed by now.
At this point I didn't think it could keep going. It must've been a fluke. But no, in comes "All Out of Love" by Air Supply. Air Supply?! What could possibly be worse than... And then I hear it. Those first few notes... and then, "Looooooooooong agoooooooooo...." Is that Karen Carpenter? It is. It's "Superstar."
I can't hold it in anymore, so when the waitress returns I ask her what kind of music are they piping in here, is it satellite radio? She confirmed it was Sirius Satellite radio, but she wasn't sure what station it was on. I said it must be 70s Suicide Soft Rock, while my Mother stated her conspiracy theory that it was to increase purchases at the bar.
Thinking since dinner was ending, and this streak of songs was way too coordinated, I thought the last song we'd hear would be a change-up. But I hear something familiar again... and as we get up to leave I hear, "Hello, It's Me... I've thought about us for a long, long time." Thanks, Todd Rundgren, thanks.
